uptempodemonplumsauce: "I wanted to flay her and hang her skin as a flag..."

...says Klaus of his former soulmate during Season 3 of The Originals. I'm using my nightly three hour sleep break to finally catch up on The Originals. Yes, my jet lag is still stronger than my sleeping pills. God, I love Klaus.

This + blue jeans is what my afternoon looked like

I jolt awake to my 830a alarm. I force myself to get up. My jet lag feels like it's getting stronger? That sucks. Sometime between 530 and 830 the temperature dropped about 15 degrees. I spend the morning in my sweatshirt because I cannot shake my bone chill. I guess no beach today either. Pout.

I have a dilemma because I don't want to see anything Stella will want to see when she gets here, so the major sights like Sagrada Familia are out. The upside is that keeps me away from big touristy sights- conceivably anyway. Really the only time I've not felt surrounded by tourists has been in my own (Paula's) neighborhood. Regardless, I have no plan for today. I tell Paula at breakfast and she suggests Palau de la Música.

The sun drop arch over Palau de la Musica

I leave tomorrow and my jet lag is making me slower than usual in every way. I take the morning to pack and listen to podcasts. (Recommendation! Conversations with People Who Hate Me. Dylan Marron is a social activist who receives a lot of hateful messages. He calls the hatemail senders and engages them in a conversation about their perceived differences. It's fantastic. )

I organize a rough list of touristy-light activities, except for the tour at Palau de la Música, and finally leave the house. The tour is pretty spectacular. Interesting tidbits:

-The Palau de la Música has over 300 performances scheduled each year.

-It's design is Modernismo (Catalan Art Nouveau) which uses natural light, concrete, mosaics, and wrought iron.

-The Muses of Music surround the stage- only performers can see all eighteen because of their onstage perspective. Each muse plays a different instrument because all music is welcome at Palau de la Música.

-It has a “very big organ” (lol) consisting of over 2200 pipes.

-The center dome is designed to be a drop of sun, as sunlight literally drops into the room. The angels choir surrounds the sun.

Cute little Nudie-to-the-Right beach signs

When I emerge from the tour the weather is surprisingly warm and pleasant... like beach weather! I scrap my half assed day and head to the beach.

Rick Steves book warns of the long walk to the beach from the metro, but I like long walks. ('...on the beach, nights in front of the fire place and sushi.' Shout out to Spoonie Love’s personal ad on Crank Yankers? Anyone?) This is a pretty dry walk though. It's like walking through Century City or a business park. Ugh...

When the horizon finally breaks and I'm able to see the beach and its sparkling Mediterranean blue water, I am unprepared for how excited I am. I'M AT THE BEACH!

Barcelona has beaches lined up in succession, starting with Platja Sant Sebastiá and ending, seven beaches later, with Platja del Llevant, the newest, furthest and least touristy beach. My sights are on Mar Bella, beach #6, the clothing optional beach. There are a few reasons why:

-I never get to sunbathe topless because American puritanical fear is LAME BS.

-The first time I ever went topless was sixteen years ago in Barcelona for 15 minutes to prove to myself I wasn't chicken. I like the symmetry of coming back to roughly the same place to do roughly the same thing as a grown ass woman.

-Boobies! In the Sun! My white boobies can see the sun!

Today deserves Sangria & Pintxos: Chorizo, dolmas,
croquettas, jamon, curry empanada

So, here's the thing. My nude beach fantasies starred me and other liberated women. No men. My nude beach reality is, I see 500% more penis than I do any part belonging to a woman. As soon as I see my first penis, I notice the Be Gay! Bar and realize I have to adjust my feminist fantasy.

Being perpetually optimistic, I had shoved my bikini into my purse as I left home just in case. Yay me! I find myself changing on the beach in a public restroom stall the size of an airplane toilet. As I start to strip, I get the genius idea to put my string bikini bottoms on like a diaper rather than peel off my jeans and sneakers, thus saving my feet and clothes from the floor of the public toilet. If I pull off the diaper move, I also avoid fighting my jeans back up my sweaty sticky legs and rubbing them with toilet floor germs. It doesn't occur to me to remove all my clothes and just walk around in my bikini. That's too obvious.

Looong story short, the diaper thing doesn't work because of bikini engineering. Back on the boardwalk, I spend OVER AN HOUR trying to repair my bikini bottoms with a ball point pen because I REALLY want to be in that water. I'm like McGyver but slower, less successful, and covered in ink. Booooo.

Pretty Pintxos!

Its killing me that I can't fix my suit because I feel so close, but I finally give up because I'm suddenly so tired and hungry that I get emotional. Jet lag.

I take myself to Carrer del Blai for pintxos and sangria on a friend's recommendation. Pintxos are pretty eats held together (pinched = pintxos) by a toothpick that you self serve off the bar. When you finish eating, you pay based on how many toothpicks you have collected. I have so much fun eating my first lunch that I stroll to the next block of Blai and I eat a second lunch.

I leave early tomorrow for Granada. I'm equal parts excited/unprepared. I arranged a rental car to make the 8-hour drive from Barcelona, because I wanted the adventure of driving across Spain but... I kinda wish I could nap for 8 hours instead.

City art: Mosaic with donated photos by Joan Fontcuberta, "The World Begins With Every Kiss"
From the placard, "The sound of a kiss is not so loud as a cannon,
but its echo lasts a great deal longer."- Oliver Wendall Holmes